Life Before Tennis: Kingdom of Tears
by ZukaFujiZone
Summary: Contrary to popular belief, Tezuka was not born with a tennis racket in hand. Nor was his life initially dedicated to bringing a bunch of middle-schoolers to the nationals at the expanse of his arm and his career. A semi-AU, exploring Tezuka's boyhood, his life before tennis and the person who taught him the meaning of passion. Future TezukaxFuji.


**Title:** Life Before Tennis: Kingdom of Tears**  
Rating: **PG-13.  
**Pairing: **Tezuka centric, later TezukaxFuji**  
Summary: **Contrary to popular belief, Tezuka was not born with a tennis racket in hand. Nor was his life initially dedicated to bringing a bunch of middle-schoolers to the nationals at the expanse of his arm and his career. A semi-AU, exploring Tezuka's boyhood, his life before tennis and the person who taught him the meaning of passion.

**Warning: **Not Beta-ed. Sorry for any mistakes you find!  
**Disclaimer: **The plot is inspired by Chihayafuru, an anime that UmiHoshi has recently showed me. For some reason, it really motivated me to pick up writing again, so I hope you enjoy! Also, I don't own Tezuka and Fuji, they own each other.

* * *

**~ Life Before Tennis ~**_  
Kingdom of Tears_

Ever since his youngest days, he was trained to become a man of importance. He had to score the best grades, had to excel in sports and arts and had to impress others around him. Young Tezuka Kunimitsu's grandfather used to be a proud general of Japan's elite police unit; it was only natural for him to want his grandson disciplined and brave, glorious enough to outshine the brightest star in the sky. Luckily for him, Kunimitsu was a hard-working young child who adored his grandfather and never failed to meet or even surpass his expectations. When he wasn't studying in his room, Kunikazu would find his grandson at the dojo, either overthrowing his companions in judo or being overthrown by those more experienced than him. Despite his six young years, Kunimitsu never failed to stand back up after falling to the ground, determination and renewed vigor burning in his chocolate orbs.

Needless to say, his parents had high esteem for him. He was the best of best: polite, brave, outgoing and hardworking. Surely, nothing would ever stand in his way.

Jealousy, however, thought otherwise.

~oO~Oo~oO~Oo~

Kunimitsu sighed as another morning greeted the world. He shut his alarm off five minutes before it would go off, having already awoken a few minutes ago. Tiredly, he reached for his oval glasses on the nightstand and secured them on the bridge of his nose. Seeing that no one was in his room so early in the morning, the young child allowed his head to bow, his shoulders to hang. He rubbed his eyes then took a deep breath. With renewed determination which killed a little more the light shining in his eyes, he squared his shoulders, lifted his head and rose off the bed. After changing and washing up, he went down for breakfast, where everyone was already seated since the Tezuka family had a habit of rising early. After wishing everyone good morning and eating, his father drove him to school for another tiring day.

After his father had left, Kunimitsu allowed himself to take another deep breath right before entering his elementary school. His small hands gripped the straps of his backpack tighter and despite his beating heart, he forbid himself to look down. Before he had even made three steps, he could already hear the other kids whispering to each other while looking at him. Some of them had a mocking expression while others were skeptic and tried to avoid him. Hence, as usual, Tezuka quietly made it to his classroom and seated himself at his desk, alone. He was used to this: after all, he had the best grades in every subject and the approval of almost every other kid's parents. He was quiet, uncomplaining and the subject of every praise. _"Why not follow Tezuka-kun's lead?"_ the teacher would say. _"Look, Tezuka-kun can do it, it's not hard!"_ and _"See? Tezuka-kun's not complaining, you should take him as an example!"_

It has always been Tezuka-kun this, Tezuka-kun that. It wasn't long before every kid of the school had heard of him and mocked his abilities. So what, they would ask, if Tezuka had the best grades? Unlike the other kids, he had no friends, got on everyone's nerves just by being present and still dared to hold his head up as if he owned the place. Ignoring Tezuka was considered a trend: he wasn't normal so obviously, the other kids wouldn't want to play with him. He didn't act like a kid, he didn't talk like a kid, and most importantly, his eyes did not shine with the light of innocence every single child had.

He was an outcast, a child that has matured too fast.

Suddenly, a piece of eraser hit the young Kunimitsu on the head. Wincing a little, he rubbed the place where the offending object landed and turned around to glare at the culprit. Class hadn't started yet so the offender, along with his friends, insulted him of being a coward while laughing and pointing his injured head. Kunimitsu clenched his fists and bit the inside of his cheeks. He could feel his throat constrict in an attempt to stop his eyes from watering and his powerful hands from straying. He turned away from them and unpacked his bag, unconsciously snuggling closer to his desk, the only place in school that still provided a minimum of comfort. Quickly glancing at the clock as he narrowly dodged another piece of flying eraser, he wished dearly for classes to begin. Slowly, agonizingly slow, the rest of the students filled up the class and the long-awaited bell rang to announce the beginning of class.

Everyone was already at their seats, waiting impatiently for their teacher to arrive. Not long after, two pairs of footsteps rung out through the hallways and stopped in front of their class. For a second, the whole class fell silent, anticipating the sliding of the door. They weren't disappointed as, a moment later, their homeroom teacher stepped in, her usual cheerful smile plastered on her face. She motioned for someone still outside the class to come in, and beamed as the new petite transfer student walked in.

"Class, we are going to have a new transfer student starting today. Please be nice and welcoming!" she said, her voice singing. Then, she motioned for the new student to do the introductions.

"My name is Fuji Syuusuke, please take care of me," the child said, bowing and opening his eyes to reveal large, bright blue orbs.

The class was in awe. The transfer student was polite, amiable and charismatic, just like Tezuka was, but without the arrogance. Already, the uncontained chatter began, as everyone wanted another playmate added to their group of friends.

"The only empty seat available is next to Tezuka-kun" the teacher began. Immediately, the noise died down, as the students silently pitied Fuji for what was about to come next. "Tezuka-kun is the top student of the school, he excels in everything he does, so we really hope you'll learn a lot from him!" the teacher said cheerfully, killing Tezuka a little more inside and making him want to shrink in his seat. The rest of the class scoffed. Every single one of them was confident that within the day, Fuji would be just as annoyed as they are with Tezuka.

For a moment, Tezuka had let himself hope that maybe, this new student wouldn't know about his "reputation" so that he could, with continuous effort, perhaps make a friend. Unsurprisingly, the small flame of wishful thinking he had allowed himself to light up was extinguished by a hurricane the following nanosecond. Unable to keep his head up as the new transfer student walked to the desk next to his, Tezuka bit his lip, and nodded slightly in acknowledgment without sparing him a glance. The transfer student, in turn, bowed his head as nothing more but a polite gesture, quietly took his seat, his eyes closed, his lips stretched in a smile.

It was his indifference that dimmed what was left of the light shining in Tezuka's eyes.

~oO~Oo~oO~Oo~

Seeing as Fuji was easily approached, polite and simply adorable according to his teachers, he had made friends with just about everyone in his class. During recess, he'd smile silently as the whole class (save Tezuka, even though the latter really wished he had enough courage to do so too) gravitated around him. Some wanted to chat, others play, while the rest wanted to share the snack their parents packed for them with him. Fuji, being the sociable child, in turn told them stories of his family, his cute little brother and beautiful big sister, captivating them with his natural charisma. He also played with them when invited and excelled in every game from tag to hide and seek. However, unlike Tezuka, he offered challenge and comfort at the same time, knowing when to be reserved and when to be outgoing. He was the genius the class could look up to without jealousy, the perfect idol Tezuka never was.

And the latter told himself, while taking a deep breath just like he did every morning before entering class, that it was for the best. Since everyone was drawn to Fuji, he was less subject to bullying. And even though he knew he was strong enough to counter all those pranks the other students pulled on him, thanks to his skills in judo, he never had the courage to raise his hand against his enemies, knowing he would be one against thirty five. All he could do was silently keep his grades up, his teachers proud, and his tears at bay. It was enough, he told himself.

The biggest surprise, however, came on Monday, a week later, when the results of their previous math exam had come out. As per usual, their teacher would call the names of the students to get their grades, the last one being the one who had scored the highest grade. When the homeroom teacher had called Tezuka up, she had an unreadable expression on her face which made him frown. He had counted the number of students that had passed before him, and he was sure that he had gotten the highest grade, but unlike usual, her teacher was not showering him with praises. Instead, she said: "Tezuka-kun, your score was almost perfect, except for a small mistake you could have avoided. But don't worry, your grades are still as perfect as they can get!"

The class was already whispering. Some gossiped about what could make perfect Tezuka commit a mistake, others snickered at his sudden downfall. Tezuka knew his grandfather would be displeased: he had let his guard down. But what happened next made him forget all about the scolding he would get that night.

"Fuji Syuusuke," the teacher began despite the noise, "please come get your exam. Congratulations on scoring a perfect grade!" she cheerfully exclaimed. Tezuka had forgotten to count the new transfer student.

The class fell silent. Tezuka's eyes widened and for the first time, he took a good look at his desk mate. The fragile-looking boy stood up, the same smile he usually wore still plastered on his face, and accepted his papers with a slight bow. Biting the inside of his cheek, Tezuka felt his throat constrict again. The whole class was staring at Fuji, and despite being outclassed, Tezuka could only ask himself: _"why Fuji?"_ The cheerful transfer student did not deserve to be resented by the class. He looked fragile, and he wouldn't be able to take all the bullying he'll get now that he's scored the best grade. Tezuka glanced at his left, Fuji was now silently seated next to him. The class resumed, agonizingly slow in Tezuka's opinion, and for the first time in his life, he hated the silence that reigned in the room.

If only he hadn't let his guard down, he wouldn't have dragged brilliant, innocent, fragile Fuji down into his hell.

Learning the meaning of regret at the tender age of six was harsh, Tezuka decided, as the last spark of innocence he had in his eyes completely died out.

~oO~Oo~oO~Oo~

Tezuka was ready, as the whole class surrounded Fuji the minute that last period ended, to protect him from the harsh treatment he thought he would get. To his surprise, it wasn't jealousy nor hatred that shone in the eyes of his classmates; it was admiration. Every one praised him for obtaining the perfect score, saying things such as "I knew you were the best!" and "You even beat Tezuka! That should teach him!" Fuji simply stayed silent and smiled.

It wasn't that Tezuka was disappointed. He simply didn't know why his eyes watered and his hands trembled. He quickly packed his things and walked as fast as he could without looking like he was running away. He didn't want to stay in school a second longer. He didn't want to go home. His grandfather would be disappointed in him. He wished he had someone that would make him laugh and forget the pain he felt.

Come to think of it, when was the last time he laughed?

"_You are a man, Kunimitsu, and men don't cry,"_ his grandfather told him all the time. He bit his lip to keep the tears from falling while his feet carried him to the park where people played a game that he was told was called tennis. He hid himself behind a tree, closed his eyes, and listened to the sound of racket hitting balls. He trembled for a few more minutes before the soothing sound triggered his determination.

He really shouldn't be complaining. So what if he had no friends? He had dignity (that's what his grandfather told him, although he still had to comprehend the complete meaning of that word). And maybe he was bullied, be he was stronger than every one of them. He was disliked by his classmates, but their parents and his teachers loved him. He was alone, but he had the highest sco—

…no, not anymore, he told himself. Still, he would give everything up to save Fuji from being like himself.

He would become the best of best, so that Fuji wouldn't have to be bullied by the class for scoring good grades.

~oO~Oo~oO~Oo~

Jealousy was not something Tezuka was capable of, having lived his scarce six years in praise and admiration, while being on the receiving end of uncontained jealousy from his peers. He knew how it felt and he wished no one else would ever experience what he is going through.

Mostly not perfect, fragile, brilliant Fuji Syuusuke.

Perhaps he was worrying too much, because for the following weeks, Fuji was on par with him in every exam they took and even though teachers were starting to notice and praise him the same way they did Tezuka, none of the people in their class seemed to mind. Fuji still played with his friends and still talked about his beautiful big sister and adorable little brother, sometimes showing his genius while other times hiding behind another's shadow.

Tezuka was incapable of jealousy, so he could only be glad that Fuji had not fallen into the class' blacklist like he did. He was convinced Fuji wouldn't be able to take all the bullying: he looked so fragile and breakable.

Tezuka, however, was now more subject to mockery than ever before. _"What happened to the class' precious number one?"_ some would ask. _"Fuji will become much better than Tezuka anyway! He's nicer and smarter and funnier!" _others would exclaim. Although he was still ahead of Fuji (having scored slightly better in the last history exam), Tezuka now wondered if it wouldn't be better to let Fuji become number one. That way, maybe, the mockery would stop. That way, maybe, he would have a little more courage to come to class.

That way, maybe, the world would one day forget about him being Tezuka, and he could finally make a friend.

But recently, when Fuji came to sit next to him, he would send a particular smile his way before the beginning of class. It made his stomach flutter and his insides tingle. Despite that, Tezuka refused to acknowledge him, for if anyone saw Fuji being associated to him in any way, the class would stop being friends with him and Fuji would hate Tezuka for dragging him down.

The only one who never bullied Tezuka was Fuji. Although they didn't really play nor talk to each other, Fuji never participated in the bullying and oftentimes even tried to change the topic when people mocked him. It was what kept Tezuka from crying on some particularly harsh days.

For example, yesterday, when Ishida 'accidently' pushed him in an icy puddle of water while they were running during P-E class, Fuji volunteered to take him to the infirmary for a change of clothes. They never said anything, and Tezuka walked with his head high despite trembling from the cold. He tried to keep himself as far away from Fuji as possible. He didn't want Fuji to have anything to do with him.

He wasn't surprised that he had caught a cold. He felt dizzy the whole day, but said nothing for fear of showing weakness. It was lunch time, and Tezuka usually ate alone in the class, but today he felt horrible and not hungry in the least. So he silently watched his classmates squeeze out of the room with their packed lunchboxes and only allowed his shoulders to slump and his pain to show when he was alone. He leaned on his desk, closed his eyes and hoped he would have enough energy for the afternoon.

"Tezuka-kun."

At the sound of Fuji's voice, Tezuka's head snapped up, his shoulders squaring in a nanosecond despite the wave of dizziness he felt. He hadn't heard Fuji come in the class and bit his lip at being taken off guard.

"What do you want?" he asked, hoping to sound as disagreeable as he could to drive Fuji away. What if someone came in and saw them together? What if Fuji starts hating him?

"You are not feeling well," Fuji said softly. "I'll go ask the infirmary for medicine."

"No!" Tezuka almost shouted, before a series of cough forbid him to talk any more.

"Please let me help," Fuji said, smile disappearing for the first time from his face. "I know you must hate me for sometimes taking your place as number one… but my nee-san says that I have to be especially nice to those who hate me."

Surprised, Tezuka stared as Fuji looked down, hands fumbling nervously his shirt, looking vulnerable. Without thinking, he told Fuji: "I don't hate you."

At that, the small boy looked up, blue blue eyes shining. "Then, will you be me friend?"

"No," Tezuka replied as quickly as he could.

Fuji's shoulders sagged. "Why not?"

"You cannot take being bullied."

Fuji tilted his head slightly to the side, a sign of incomprehension.

"If you become my friend, you will become the class' enemy"

"I don't mind!" Fuji said, determined.

Tezuka stared at him, surprised. "Why do you want to become my friend?"

"Because you are real," Fuji replied simply.

This time, it was Tezuka's turn to frown, not understanding.

Fuji tried to explain the best as he could: "You don't share your snacks with me because others do it, you don't ask to play with me on purpose because others want to play with me and you don't bully those weaker than you. They are what others want them to be, but you are you."

Unconvinced, Tezuka simply stared at Fuji.

"And you are just like me," the latter finally said.

It was then Tezuka finally looked into Fuji's eyes.

And he saw reflected in those deep aqua orbs the same lack of innocence as his own.

~oO~Oo~oO~Oo~

After that, Fuji would smile at him every morning before settling comfortable beside him. Sometimes, when they coincidentally met at the school gates, Tezuka would bow to Fuji's big sister and she would smile at him, take her little brother's hand and secure it in Tezuka's. On those days when they would enter class hand in hand, Fuji would receive disapproving glares from their classmates, but unlike what Tezuka thought, his smile did not waver. On the third week since Fuji's transfer, they were already known to be inseparable. Tezuka would smile a lot more often, and perform even better than before. Fuji would always be able to keep up with him, and although he was never subjected to bullying, the class no longer revolved around him.

With Fuji around, Tezuka was no longer the subject of jealousy but a mix between envy and admiration. However, on those days when Fuji outclassed him in a subject, he'd always leave early to take refuge behind that tree, next to the tennis courts. He'd let himself be calmed by the unique sound of racket hitting tennis balls and gather his courage to face his grandfather's wrath. On those days, he wished he could tell his family that he wanted to learn to play tennis instead of judo, but he knew without even thinking that he would be refused.

On those days, he wished he could see Fuji smile and use that as an excuse to forget about his impossible dream.

~oO~Oo~oO~Oo~

Fuji never failed to disappoint him. On the fifth week after his transfer, and after a particularly shameful defeat on Tezuka's part during their last history exam, (it was his best subject), Fuji had silently followed him to his secret hideout. Just as Tezuka was about to hug his knees and burry his head in his arms to keep the tears at bay, Fuji showed up next to him, pearls of crystalline tears flowing down his cheeks. Startled, Tezuka squared his shoulders, trying to keep himself from crying too as Fuji grabbed his hand and hid his face in his shoulder.

It was unbearable to listen to the usually cheerful Fuji sobbing. Before Tezuka could stop them, tears fell from his chocolate orbs too. He brought his one and only friend in a comforting hug and listened to the sound of tennis.

~oO~Oo~oO~Oo~

"Ne, Tezuka-kun, why do you always come here?" Fuji asked once their tears dried.

"Because I like tennis," Tezuka replied.

"Do you play tennis?" Fuji asked again.

"No."

"Why not?"

"Because my grandfather wants me to learn judo."

"But can't you learn both at the same time?" Fuji tilted his head to the side.

"My grandfather would probably not let me."

"Why not?" Fuji persisted.

"I want to become a pro tennis player, but my grandfather wants me to become a general in Tokyo's police unit," Tezuka replied.

"Do you want to become a general?"

"…I want to play tennis."

"Then you should play tennis," Fuji said.

"I can't."

Fuji pouted. "Why not? It's your dream, isn't it? Nee-san says that we should always make our dreams come true with effort and practice. Because you won't be happy if it doesn't come true."

Tezuka couldn't deny that Fuji was right. But even so, he didn't have the courage to tell his grandfather. Instead, Tezuka chose to change the topic. "What about you?"

"I want to become a world-famous photographer!" Fuji exclaimed, his blue eyes shining. "But nee-san says it's not possible right now, so I should start by doing something else."

"What do you want to do?"

"I want to play tennis!" Fuji smiled. "Because we always get the same grades, I want to know who would be stronger in tennis!"

Tezuka smiled, glad that Fuji shared his interest. "Tomorrow, do you want to watch them play tennis with me, here?"

The addressed boy lowered his eyes and fell silent. Perplexed, Tezuka wondered if he said something wrong. But Fuji quickly smiled again and said: "You should tell your grandfather that you want to play tennis, so that later, when you become very good at it, we can have a match and see who is strongest."

"I don't want to disappoint him."

"You won't," Fuji said, determined. "I have to go, now," he continued, standing up and waving Tezuka goodbye.

At that time, Tezuka didn't think too much of Fuji's sudden departure. He simply closed his eyes, basked in the sound of tennis and pondered what Fuji said.

~oO~Oo~oO~Oo~

The next day, Fuji was gone. Their homeroom teacher explained that Fuji's family was originally from a place called Chiba, in Kantou. They moved to Tokyo for a month to see how it was, and maybe they would move permanently here later. _"When was 'later'?" _some in the class would ask. The teacher did not respond. For the first time, Tezuka despised her for not having the answer to something. Fuji didn't tell him he would be leaving. Was this why he was crying so heartedly yesterday? Tezuka felt something squeeze his heart and suddenly, breathing became difficult.

How he made it through the day without crying, Tezuka did not know. But as soon as school ended, he ran to his secret hideout, despite the warning his parents gave him about rain in the afternoon. He stubbornly sat behind that tree like he did yesterday, waiting patiently for his friend to show up. This time, there was no sound of tennis to soothe him, as large clouds were gathering in the sky.

Two hours later, when the skies began to rumble and lightning flashed with no sign of Fuji at all, Tezuka finally let go of his fake mask and allowed his tears mix with the rain.

~oO~Oo~oO~Oo~

"Kunimitsu!" he heard his mother call him, her voice full of fear and panic. Said boy opened his eyes painfully to the sight of white sheets and the smell of medicine.

"Kunimitsu, you are finally awake after five days… thank heavens!" he heard his father exclaim. "Do you remember what happened?"

A few other people clad in white coats surrounded him, but Kunimitsu couldn't recognize them. And as he searched his memories, he couldn't really remember why he was in a hospital. However, seeing the relieved expressions on his parents' face was enough to calm him. He shook his head at his father's question.

"Temporary selective memory loss was something to be expected," a man wearing a white coat said. "I found this child unconscious in a park, tears still flowing down his face in the rain. He chose to lay there despite not having any apparent illness that could prevent him from seeking shelter until he caught hypothermia. Whatever made him so sad had to be something big."

Kunimitsu's parents denied knowing the cause of such sadness, and the child just listened on, not really understanding. His mind was blank and the pain in his throat, numbing. Kunimitsu wished for nothing but sleep, to escape it all. He wasn't strong, he had disobeyed his grandfather and became weak…

He wanted nothing else but to disappear when suddenly, his grandfather barged in the room, looking panicked. He didn't know what ignited the sudden flame of determination in his eyes, but before he knew it, he was staring directly in his grandfather's grey eyes.

"I want to play tennis."

And nothing would stop him from reaching his goal. Because he had promised that he would chase his dreams bravely, unwaveringly, make them come true, and some day, he'll meet… Kunimitsu felt a wave of dizziness hit him.

Perhaps forgetting was for the best.

**~Kingdom of Tears- End~**

* * *

**A/N: **Stay tuned for the second part of this trilogy entitled Life and Tennis – Age of Glory where Tezuka and Fuji meet again… and start anew! Romance (and a little angst) coming right up!

That, and I was wondering if anyone would want me to continue Tales of the Magical Buchou ^^;;


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